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What is my purpose in life? I’ve been thinking about that a lot lately. So let me muse aloud here just a little.

Right now it looks like my purpose is to raise Godly children. And to please my husband. And to keep the house tidy and running smoothly. But is that really my purpose in life? Is that what God made me to do?

Let’s backtrack about six years. I was single—in love, but still single. I had a very determined goal in mind: I was going to study to be a Bible worker. I had just finished a summer of selling Christian books door to door—canvassing, we called it—and had been accepted for the winter/spring term in the Amazing Facts College of Evangelism. If you had asked me at that time what I felt my purpose in life was, I would have said it was to win souls for Jesus, to do outreach. I knew two languages and was working on a third, and I wanted to be equipped as a Bible worker with the training that would make me an effective soul winner.

I went to that college. After I finished, I did some more canvassing, then got married. After a blissful honeymoon, we moved down to the bottom of Texas to start our first assignment as Bible workers for the Texas Conference.

But things didn’t work out like we had thought. My health declined for some unknown reason (I still don’t know what it was). I was tired all the time and didn’t have the stamina to go out looking for Bible studies. Even though I was the one with the training, my husband ended up being the one who did the work, while I stayed home or went with him half of the time. Then our different personalities began to rub each other in the middle of doing God’s work. I was raised to be very punctual, and it bothered me to be late for appointments. On the other hand, my husband is much more relaxed—Hispanics tend to be that way, and we were in an area of Texas that has a very high Hispanic population, so I really had no reason to fret. But we decided that we just couldn’t continue as Bible workers. The pay was barely enough to make ends meet, and we had absolutely no savings to fall back on for emergencies. It’s easy to talk about making sacrifices, but reality is a while other thing, and we weren’t ready for it yet, at least, not as a couple.

So we told the evangelist we were working for that we would finish our term with this church and then we weren’t going to continue. He tried to talk us out of it, but we felt it was the best thing for us in our marriage, so we stood our ground.

The month that our term ended, I got pregnant. That put a new perspective on everything. I now was to be a wife and mother. I took a part-time job during my pregnancy, but have not worked outside the home since my daughter was born.

Now here I am with two precious children, considering my purpose in life. Why did God make me? Was I born here to gratify my desires and those of my husband and children? Is life just about keeping the house clean, cooking delicious meals, and raising godly children?

God made us as His children. He wanted us to be His special people on this planet, worshiping Him and making the universe a better place for our presence. But Adam ate the fruit, and everything changed. Or did it? Did God’s purpose for us change? In some ways it did. But ultimately it didn’t. When sin has been dealt with and is eradicated from this planet, God’s original purpose for us will be realized every moment for the rest of eternity.

Looking at the big picture helps me to see that it isn’t about me at all. It’s about God. God’s purpose for me is much more far reaching than simply my doing right. He wants me to live with Him forever. And He wants me to bring as many with me as I can.

So this morning after church I went to the pastor and asked if I could talk to him. I told him what I had been hiding: that I had gone to the Amazing Facts school and been trained as a Bible worker. He was naturally a little surprised, but he reminded me that now as a mother of young children it wasn’t necessarily practical for me to do active outreach, that I had a mission field right at home. I told him that I realized that, but I felt I could do more. He was already late to an appointment, so he just said a prayer and left, but he said he would talk to the lay outreach coordinator (personal ministries director, I think she would be called) and have her contact me.

I still don’t know what this will look like. I don’t have transportation during the week, so on weekends I have to get my shopping done, and that uses up all my time. If someone wanted Bible studies and could come to my house, I would be glad to help. But maybe there’s something else I can do. Maybe I could help with correspondence Bible studies. Maybe I could just witness to the neighbors. I’m not sure how to do that yet, but I’m praying about it every day.

So what is my purpose in life? It is to glorify God in everything I do. Whether that means giving a Bible study to the lady down the hill, or passing out tracts on a Sabbath afternoon, or making sure the house is tidy and the children so that my husband is refreshed and not stressed when he comes into the home—whatever it means, I must do it to God’s glory. And I must learn to avoid anything that would hinder my walk with God. Even good things. Christ must be my all in all.


One Response

  1. #1
    ~marci~ 

    A little introspection is a good thing. I have had some of the same questions lately, as my role as a parent has been changing. Only God can answer those questions…at times He may work through human agents to help us understand His plan

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