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Posts tagged ‘communicate’

Having had a baby recently, I found this article very relevant, and I wanted to share it with my readers.

Life has presented your family with another wonderful gift and you are bringing home your newest bundle of joy! Thankfully, this birth probably went smoother and your anxieties were less because of your previous experience. However, every new parent knows that with every new child come new hurdles. Here are some helpful hints to help your first or second born adjust comfortably with their newest sibling:

Making time: It is important that you know how to manage your time with your new and bigger family. That means you want to make time not only for your newest child but your other children, your spouse and most importantly yourself. It is understood that in the first few weeks your attention will be directed at your newborn over the others but as a parent you need to be able to share your time evenly among your children. Be sure to make one-on-one time each day, with each child, do the same with your spouse and then yourself. Even if you only have thirty minutes to do so, do it. It will help you and your family to adjust and enjoy the next step in your family’s life.

Communicate: In any relationship you know that communication is key to making it a successful and loving one. Your child will have lots of questions and frustrations and depending on their age, may have difficulty expressing this, which in return will cause them to act out. As a parent you need to have open communication with your other children. Some tips to help you and your other children to communicate: separate yourselves to be alone, get on the same eye level, use a soft voice and ask them to use their words to speak with you. You may need to ask them questions to get an answer: ‘Are you upset at mommy?’, ‘Are you sad or mad?’ etc. basic questions like this will help you communicate and reassure with your child that even with the new baby everything is fine.

Create a routine: The easiest method for a smooth transition in bringing home your newest baby is to create a routine as soon as possible. Creating a daily routine and schedule will help everyone in the family get used to a new way of life. Start with a breakfast routine, school, dinner and bedtime routine. These routines will give yourself a peace of mind as well as your other children. It helps everyone in your family know what to expect and avoid any frustrations or unwanted surprises.

This can be a fun or frustrating time, depending on how you prepare and react to this situation. Remember to create a routine, communicate and make time! Good luck and enjoy every minute of your new family because time flies when you are having fun!

 

Roxanne Porter is a freelancer & a regular contributor for nanny wanted. She helps in providing knowledge about nanny services & love writing on nanny related articles. She helps in giving a fair knowledge about nanny Jobs to the community. You can be in touch with her at “r.poter08 [at] gmail.com

I think I have finally figured out the secret to parenting.

Okay, when I say “figured it out,” I don’t mean that I have a 100% perfect understanding of it. But I think I have enough of a concept to apply it and to share it.

And it wasn’t my original discovery. It comes from the book Parenting Your Infant/Toddler by the Spirit by Sally Hohnberger. And “it” is the parenting pyramid.

In my own words, this pyramid means that God is at the top, desiring to communicate to my child and me. Because I am the parent, I need to open up the lines of communication–two-way communication. I need to make sure my heart is fully surrendered in the moment. And let me tell you, lack of surrender on our part is a big reason why we fail to bring our children to true obedience. Just try making a child obey cheerfully by yelling at them!

The second aspect is that God also wants to communicate directly to the child. However, the rebellious, tantrum-throwing two-year-old isn’t listening. So we as the parent, now surrendered to the Lord, will communicate to them, and direct them to listen to what God is saying to them. Then we lead them to surrender as well. Once they surrender, the lines of communication are open between both parent and child and God and child.

Now, that’s good in theory, but let me make this practical with some illustrations from my life today.

It was time to pick up the toys and get ready for worship. But neither of my children wanted to pick up the toys. Manny tried to throw a tantrum and Gislaine started to cry. Because I couldn’t deal with them both at once, I sent Gislaine to her room and told her to wait until I called her. Then I told Manny that he needed to surrender his heart to Jesus and put the toys away. I said, “Let’s pray,” but he jerked in defiance. So I took his hand and said, “We need to go for a run.” We ran the length of the house and back. Then I knelt again and asked him to pray with me. He knelt, folded his hands, and closed his eyes. Then he repeated after me. “Dear Jesus, please help me to put my toys away happy. Amen.” Then I showed him the toy, and repeated my instruction. He put it away. At first he was just compliant–putting it away under protest. But as I directed him to put more and more away, his heart softened until by the time he was done, he was a cheerful, happy little boy. And Daddy noticed later, after I had gone to the gym, that he was the happiest, most obedient, surrendered little boy that he had been for a long time, and commented on it to me when I got back.

Once he was busy putting his toys away, I called his sister out. We knelt and I led her in a similar prayer. Then I asked her, “What is Jesus saying to you?” She said, “To obey.” That just warmed my heart! Jesus was speaking to my precious daughter, and she recognized His voice! I said, “That’s right. Now please put the dolly’s bed away.” And she did. She also helped her brother put some things away. And she was happy when it was over.

And so was I!

Yes, it took extra time to do it, but the end result was happiness for everyone, and peace in the home.

Yes, this is the secret: a connection with God, listening for His direction, and following His guidance. Most of the time, we won’t know for sure if the ideas that come to our minds are from Him or not, but we are to test the spirits, and move forward in faith. But being surrendered ourselves–to take our toddler’s hand for the grizzly run (because they are too young to run by themselves), even when we don’t feel like running–makes all the difference. Because we certainly cannot bring our child to surrender if we are not surrendered ourselves!

I’m reading this book through for the second time. I can’t say I’ve read enough recently to do a proper review of it, but I would still highly recommend it. And all the other books in the series.